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What Is My Greatest Fear?

I don’t know that I have ever been more afraid of anything in life than dying before I became a mother. Mother, that was the one thing that I have always wanted to be. I’ve reached an age in life where I have started to come to terms with the fact that time might be running out for me to start the family that I have always wanted, or even become what I've always wanted to become. I have tried to make myself okay with that in any number of ways, and well, some days it works and some days it doesn’t.

I have many fears: snakes, spiders, dying a painful death, but none greater than dying without ever having mothered a child. I think that's because I have always had a great capacity to love and no one to whom I could give that love.


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