Sugar, We're Going Down Swinging!
I haven’t updated my blog in a while, and not because I haven’t had plenty to say, but because I wanted to make this update more about progress and less about anything else. I am really excited because I have been taking pictures to illustrate my progress, I’ve been standing in the mirror clothed, semi- and not entirely clothed, and I have been blown away by what I am seeing. Not only am I losing the weight, and FAST, but I look really good. I am starting to like myself again and I am so truly excited. People have said that they see a glow in me and they can even hear a glow in my overall attitude when I talk. My confidence is skyrocketing. I am a happier person. In fact, I am the happiest that I have ever been, which almost makes me cry to say, but only because I am a big crybaby by nature.
This year hasn’t been an easy year. Towards the end of 2013 heading into surgery, I made the decision to not only remove from my life a longtime friend of mine, and one that had had the surgery prior to mine, but also made the decision to discontinue my relationship with my sister as well. I have taken a lot of flak for it from friends and family alike, but I am not dissuaded from my choice. I have been made exponentially happier by the fact that I have done this! I am free from judgment, free from cruelty, and free from indifference, even free from the bad memories that contributed to the emotional eating that got me here. Everyone should be so lucky. I do not feel guilty one damn bit.
You have to do what you have to do in order to make sure that you’re in a good space from which to start this journey. You MUST have a support system around you, not just onlookers that may or may not be happy for you or resent that you were more successful than they were. If people aren’t in your life making you feel good about the person that you are, what you’re doing, and where you’re going, then why keep them around? That goes for anyone in your life. Just because you’re biologically related, doesn’t mean that they are always in your corner.
Today, I am down 33.8 pounds since surgery on January 13th. My scars are healing very well and they’re actually fading from sight! I am just amazed and so truly thankful. I really feel like I have a new lease on life.
To recap: My weight at the time of surgery was 267.4. I had set a weight loss goal of 87 lbs to get me to an ending weight of 180, which was my weight when I graduated high school 10 years ago.
With my weight now at 233.6 and with a weight loss total so far of 33.8 pounds (in three months,) I have now shed 38% of the excess body weight that I wanted to lose!
That’s crazy exciting!
My BMI might have dictated the necessity for surgery, but it does not dictate my goal. I think that’s a sure fire way to be unhealthy in the end. I am aiming for a weight at which I knew that I looked good, I was healthy, in shape, agile, and vivacious. This isn’t about attaining a tiny size; it’s about being happy, for once.
In fact, that’s all I want, more of the happiness that I am currently enjoying.