UNSWEET TEA

  • Alia

What Do You Dislike Most About Your Appearance?

In an almost betrayal of promises that I made to myself in January 2014, I’m not as proud of my body as I had once thought I would be. Gastric bypass surgery was a choice that I made in order to change my life for the better. I was unhappy and unhealthy prior to losing the weight that I shed in the subsequent five years. I made a commitment to myself. I chose to focus my energy on accepting myself for who I was and what I looked like despite the outcome. Now, at one-hundred-sixty pounds, I am very pleased and proud, but with a few exceptions.


Gastric bypass surgery has evolved to be minimally invasive and laparoscopic. Once the procedure is done, the work is yours to do as a patient. How successful you’ll be is ultimately up to you, barring complications. I remember hitting the gym and fighting with myself to stay in there longer and longer, it was almost an obsession, I prayed at the altar of the gym to obtain the body that I desired. When I had finally achieved my goal, I sat back to take it all in. I was thin, I was fitting clothing in the single digits, and I should have been happy.


This is the excess skin of my arm after surgery,

Excess skin be damned, I was happy with myself. I promised, then, to be grateful that my life had been saved and that I could do things that I couldn’t ever do before, (like walk up a flight of stairs without losing my breath,) but now that gratefulness has faded and the stretch marks and arms with flaps that resemble a pelican’s wingspan bother me. These aren’t problems that can be fixed by going to the gym, and I knew that then; these issues require plastic surgery and body sculpting. Once skin is stretched, it can’t be unstretched. So, there, is what I hate most about my body. It would seem that what I really hate most is that I have no control over my body and, as with most uncontrollable things, that’s infuriating.