Making Progress!

Updated: Jul 26, 2018

I was told that a six month wait was mandatory before I could be scheduled for #surgery. It's pretty frustrating let me tell you. The most frustrating part being the wait itself. I can tell you that it's been pretty depressing to have tried to lose weight assisted by my doctor only to be told that I have to keep at it for an additional 6 months while I continue to gain weight at an almost sickening rate because of my #bipolar medication. I worry that I'll reach 300 pounds before I ever see the operating room. It scares me to death because I feel so out of control.

I've never had a healthy body image, even when I actually was ideal weight and in proportion. When I was in high school, I was about 178 and I was a great shape, I used to think that I was fat then only to look back and realize that I was perfect. I don't want to go into surgery thinking it'll solve all of my problems, I know that it won't, but I am looking forward to confronting what I can only term self-loathing. I want to be able to look in the mirror and like what I see regardless of what the reflection looks like. I have so very few days like that.

I received a call from my PCP's office today stating that they had my preliminary lab work completed ruling out thyroid or endocrine disorders and my first month's paperwork complete, which I faxed to the surgeon. Only 5 more months to go!

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